With the death of an uncle, the condolence letter must first consider his widow, if he was married.

“Dear Aunt _____, I am sorry to hear of your loss. I know there are few words that can comfort at this time but please know you are in my thoughts and prayers.”

“Dear Aunt _____, I am sorry to hear of the passing of Uncle ________. I pray you will be comforted in your loss knowing that so many loved him and are keeping you close in our thoughts.”

If a person was close to the uncle, he or she should include a brief memory of the diseased. It can be humorous or heartwarming but keep it short and to the point. Words that express an appreciation of his character or something learned from him are also fitting in this paragraph.

“When I think of Uncle ______, I remember the time he was telling us all crazy jokes after Thanksgiving dinner! He could make anyone laugh and gave our family lots of good memories.”

“I remember my first fishing trip with uncle ________; I was just a kid and was too terrified to get in the boat! He pulled a piece of candy out of his pocket then reached for me. I sat on his lap for an hour before I had the courage to get up and move around.”
“One of the things I appreciated the most about uncle _________ was his ability to make people laugh! We could always count on him to lighten up the atmosphere!”

“I learned so much from uncle ________, like nothing is free, so work hard and don’t get discouraged when surrounded by people that don’t care! Rather, be the person that gets it done and sets an example.”

If the person writing the letter was not close to the uncle a brief paragraph about something they had heard about him, either an event that took place in his life, something about his lifestyle in general or words that express thoughts concerning his character would be written in place of the above.

“Although I didn’t know uncle ___________ very well, I have enjoyed hearing stories about him and his time in the military and when he started his first business.”

“Although I did not have the pleasure of knowing uncle ___________ personally, I have enjoyed the stories I’ve heard about his kindness and good humor.”

Lastly, the closing should reiterate sorrow for the loss of the uncle and if possible and warranted, the offer of assistance.

“If there is any way I can help you during this time please let me know. Again, I’m very sorry for your loss and pray that you will be comforted.”

The worst things to say are, “I understand” to recount a personal experience with loss or say that time will take away the sorrow. Be brief and personal, putting the feelings of the other first, and send the letter as soon as you learn of the loss.